Sometimes

Sometimes you don't know whether the decisions that you've made are right or wrong.

You will be confused by the consequences.

Give up? But you scare that you'll miss a chance. Because things, usually will appear when you give up. Just like when you lost something important and you tried your best to search for it until you finally decided to give up. Then it appears. Just like that.

Continue? But you are tired of waiting. You are tired of reserving a place, you feel like saying, hey, do you still want to be in my world? If not please leave. I wanna reserve this place for other people. But you just can't bear to say things like that. It hurts. Not only to the people, but also to you yourself.

Letting go ain't easy. Especially when you're that kind of person who never gives up easily.

Sometimes you're just so tired of analyzing everything. And guessing the implied meaning of something is just way too, restless.

Sometimes you know that you won't make it, it won't be a nice ending but you just feel like giving it a try. Maybe you wanna get hurt then only you realized the truth. Only then you are satisfied. You comfort yourself and say, hey, at least I tried. At least I made an effort.

You stop believing sweet words. And that's also the reason why you hate superb sweet food. Candies? Yuck. A room full of pink colour? Gross. 

But you love desserts very much.

And sometimes you wonder how hypocrite you can be. When you can like and dislike something at the same time. When you can be mad and forgive a person at the same time. When you can just give up and hold on at the same time.

That day you dreamed that you were so frustrated, so mad and angry, and with all those negative feelings. Then you woke up, recalling back the dream and you let out a small laugh. Even in the dreams, you have to feel upset. Yes, even in the dreams. Then you burst into tears, trying to shake off the insecure inside you. 

Because it happened in reality that's why sometimes you dream of it. A nightmare, that's why it's known as.

Yes, you forgive people because you still want them in life. But how many times can you forgive the same person for the same mistakes?

You are not a yo-yo. You are not someone whom people can just pull you to their side when they need you and push you away when they don't. 

You'll be more delight when you're in a bunch of people who love your existence, and are happy because of you. 

And like usual, you're delight with the existence of lovely people around you. They're not perfect, but they're the ones whom you'll be happy with. The people from your primary & secondary school, and also in college, plus of course your family, they're the ones who you're happy with, all the times.

Sometimes you just need a break. You'll find something new and experience something that you would never though of. Starting new afresh makes you enjoy life even more.

Sometimes you just need to stop thinking too much.

And sometimes you just need to stop thinking 'bout sometimes. 

=)